Table Mountain Valentines Treat Turns Nasty

Being the romantic I am, I surprised my hubby with Table Mountain ride and dine tickets for Valentines. The plan was to have a lovely meal at one of the worlds most beautiful venues and watch the sunset together. But even the best made plans sometimes fall flat...

We arrived at the cable way just after 5.30pm, it was busy, but I had booked online so we went straight up in the next available cable car. I have only ever been up the mountain twice before. Once, before I left for the UK, some 9 years ago and last year winter, when we took my son on a day trip. This is the first time I would be seeing the sunset from the mountain. The trip up was glorious, the views breathtaking.

On arrival at the summit we had a walk about, even spotted some Dasie, and took some pictures of the magnificent view. We didn't want to miss a minute of the sunset, so opted to use our cafe tickets and have our meal. We both had R110 to spend, which sounded ample. But as I said earlier, even the best made plans can go South.

The Cafe "now I know why they don't call it a restaurant" was very busy. We grabbed our trays and edged our way to the Valentines buffet. A mixed feeling of  shock and horror gripped me; bain-marie after bain-marie of slightly steaming stew like "dishes", each with their own greasy texture. Everything smelt of curry "it was still 26 degrees outside", the only "other" choice was some sad looking chicken pieces and right on the end some extremely oily pizza. As we were standing there looking at this sorry lot, another bain - marie tray arrived with sliced chicken and some type of gravy.

We decided to make the best of it and I grabbed the serving spoon to attack the sliced chicken, feeling  brave I also served myself some of the meat,stew,substance. We were looking forward to seeing the salad's, but this was short lived. The green salad consisted of a large bowl of withered, limp leaves with clumps of feta thrown in and the occasional cherry tomato. There was something that resembled a pasta salad and to be honest I had given up hope by then. I sifted through the green salad trying to find greens with a little life in them.

Hubby had pretty much the same as me, for drinks we opted for a slush puppy "told you it was hot" an Energade and a hunters dry. After the weighing process," surely there's a better way of deciding a price, this is just so tacky" (by the way my excuse of a salad was R10), we made our way to pay. Our meals came to a staggering R250 so we needed to pay in the difference. By now there was no fight left in me, hubby paid the lady, and we took our awkward trays outside to find a table.


We "ate" in relative silence. After 10 minutes of trying to convince myself that it "wasn't that bad" I gave up! Hubby followed suit and we washed down the greasy taste with a mix of slush puppy and hunters. I remembered that we had a lovely sparking wine in the fridge that we bought from Laborie on Saturday and sighed when I saw the experienced Table Mountain visitors arrive with lovely picnic baskets and bottles of bubbly. Believe me, had I know the food was going to be that bad and that we could bring our own food, I would of made a quick trip to Woolies and filled up our picnic basket. But I was ignorant on both counts.


Determined not to let our failed attempt at a romantic meal get us down, we left our table and headed for a good spot to watch the sunset. A blissful twenty minutes passed, suddenly I felt an awful burning in my stomach, which quickly spread to my chest, I looked over at the hubby, "heartburn" he said knowingly, "same here" We stuck it out another 20 minutes or so, but in the end the heartburn won and we headed back to the cable car and home to our heartburn pills and a cold glass of milk. No sunset for us!

As a world famous landmark and a finalist for the new list of natural wonders of the world list, surely we can do better then this? I am sure there are many challenges to creating gourmet food at 1067m above sea level in such an environmentally sensitive environment.  But isn't that what us South African do best? We are leaders in coping with diversity and finding a way... Maybe a small set menu, using local in season products, table service versus the horrid buffet. There has to be a better way.

Almost saw the sunset!

I shudder to think what stories our foreign visitors take home about their Table Mountain Cafe experiences.  Cape Town is know as the gourmet capital of South Africa, we have more five star restaurants per kilometer then any other province, yet our most famous landmark is serving "school dinners" . Come on Table Mountain Aerial Cableway Company, you can do better then this.

Will I go back to the mountain. Definitely Yes, its wonderful . Would I eat in the Cafe again?  Unless I hear Jamie Oliver has paid a visit and sorted things out or they have made some significant changes NO NO NO.

P.S If the Table Mountain Cableway Company need some inspiration I suggest having a look at the  Eiffel Tower Restaurant. Not a curry in sight!